a poem: she found herself in the snow

she found herself in the snow...
and it is not with you...
so goodbye...
forever, perhaps?
no one can tell but her...
or you if you would only speak...
it does not happen often enough to see a pattern...
even her efforts have failed…
your words are fragile and handled with care...
treasured, savored, till no more she can bear...
words for the wind are all that they are...
tossed too and fro along with what could have been and what was...
and...what was not…
no regrets…
only illumination…
let go! let go….
her heart cries…
how can she…
her heart is still tied to things hope could bring...
her head knows there’s no way she can live like that…
it is not what she wants…
it is what she wants…
a paradox…
her life…
she realized “No” was her answer…
to all the questions, prayers, thoughts and words…
‘why?’ will never have an answer…
the story’s end will forever be hidden in fog…
unless he tells it to her…
time…
that is what it would take to hear the end…
something she knows she has…
time is worth waiting for…
hope is also worth waiting for…
when it is in the right Thing…
she found herself in the snow…
it is cold…
warm…
windy…
calm…
lonely…
crowded…
a paradox…
her life…
she waits for what she does not know…
but him? no…
yes…
as time unfolds she searches simply for the middle ground…
no more…
no less…
a happy-medium…
too much to ask…
from him…
yes…
if only her words could penetrate…
pierce his heart…
elucidate a portion of the end of the story…
no…
it won’t work…
she gets restless…
to much energy expended on trying for nothing…
no grounds gained…
she gets tired of blaming him for things…
and expecting things from him…
and hoping was becoming a burden…
and wishing took up too much of her time…
and wanting was becoming monotonous
so now…
she longs for what she knows could be true…
what she has seen played out many times…
what she knows is obtainable…
“Patience Beloved”…
‘it is very hard’…
“Yes”..
‘i will try’…
“Yes”…
‘a-men’
a promise…
a resting place…
shelter from the penetrating storm…
peace for the first time…
comfort…
it does not cover her questions…
but that will come with time…
she knows who to trust…
that is one of the hard parts…
time will tell…
finally, though an end seems near…
an end to her first beginning…
and the start to the beginning of her first end…
she had been searching for herself for months…
failing each time…
only seeing him…
now she sees…
shattered dreams…
unfulfilled desires…
lost hopes…
dissipating realities…
new dreams...
replaced desires…
found hopes….
greater realities…
she knows you showed her herself in the snow…
now she can see she’s with You...
complete, secure, settled…
You are replacing him.

!!!!!!!!!!

i realize i have not blogged in forever...i have been very busy...honestly didn't realize how much time had to be given in order to keep up with one! it's been a very long time...so here's what i've been up to sorta! haha

i am currently attempting to start a blog/website for my photography! C. Photography! look for it soon! i am about to graduate! and can't wait! i love poetry (see next post)! God is amazing and is teaching me so many things and it's incredible!

That's about all i have time for now! this is not me saying i'm about to start blogging again! haha once i get my new blog/website i'll be on that one all the time!

~C